Coffee is my Crack

I’ve been getting headaches recently and I think they’re from coffee withdrawal. I had wonderful vanilla chai creamer that I wanted to finish before it spoiled (which we already established does NOT belong in tea) and then when it was gone, I stopped drinking cold turkey. (Coffee also interferes with my teeth whitening.) The withdrawal has been painful. I remember feeling like this the last couple times I stopped drinking coffee (in Spain, after I moved out, etc.) and I don’t want to have to deal with these feelings again. In my mind, I had two choices: I could be java’s bitch and submit to its effects it has on my life (both good and bad) OR I could swear off drinking it regularly. To protect myself from the pain of withdrawal, I’m making a promise to myself to not drink it for more than 2 days in a row, EVER AGAIN.

Objectively, coffee makes me pretty happy. Unlike some people, I actually like the way it tastes. Drinking a warm beverage is almost always pleasant, especially in the coolness of the morning. I have happy memories associated with coffee drinking. My dad has made coffee every morning for like 40 years and his is the best. When I was little, I remember hearing the clinking of his spoon against the ceramic mug while he stirred his coffee. To me, that sound is like music. And the way he does it has a distinct sound/rhythm that is uniquely his.

So I guess I came to a crossroads. Some people might have just bucked up and bought the coffee maker or budgeted some extra time to stop at Dunkin Donuts every morning. For them, the idea of committing to a lifetime of dependency is no big deal when compared to having to live without that little piece of heaven every morning. They accept the good with the bad. And they can do it without thinking. And they choose to ignore thinking about that day when they might not have their trusty beverage. They forget about the headache that will result. They just use an extra dose of whitestrips.

But I choose to shack up with coffee. I will have it when I feel like it, when the spirit moves me, when I need a little pick-me-up. I will not make a lifetime commitment to it. I will enjoy what it can do for me and take measures to counteract its negative effects. I will keep my distance so that I will not have to deal with the pain of withdrawal again. Amen.